Friday, September 26, 2008

I need to follow him...

Dear family, friends and loved ones.

As you know, these past weeks at TREK have been a roller coaster. Emotions everywhere, thoughts flying all over the place, and a heart that just wanted to be settled.
God has truly lead me in a direction and I feel very at peace with this decision.
I will be participating in the TREK training, but I will not be going to Brazil this year.
This might come as a shock to some of you. I will try to explain as best as I can.

I feel that I am not ready to partake in this adventure right now in my life. I have much more to learn about my emotions and how to deal with them. I can tell you honestly that if I went to Brazil, I would not be able to give my whole heart to what I would be doing. That would not be unfair to my team, the missionaries we would be working with, and the people I will encounter. I feel like If I went, I would be the one that would need the most tending to, and not the beautiful people in Brazil, that that is just simply not fair. I just don't feel ready right now and do feel like God is leading me to stay here.
I want to tell you that I'm very at peace with this decision and I do feel like this is the right choice right now.
I was asked if I will regret this. I thought long and hard, and this is what I though. I will miss terribly not getting on the plane with the Brazil team. It will be very hard, but I know in my heart I don't think I will regret it. I look back and see all the pain, heartache, and unbearable moments and know that I'm am making the right decision.
I know with all my heart that God will use me here wherever and whatever he leads me to do.
I will be finishing the training because it is such amazing, life long tools that we are learning. I have learned so much and I'm applying it all to my life.

If you have any question please feel free to e mail me and I will do my best to answer them for you. (

I once again thank you for all the support you have given. It truly means the world to have people in my life that supported me with any decision that I was to make.

With Much love

Wednesday, September 24, 2008


Thank you so much for all the comments you leave. They always bring a smile to my face and a tear to my eye.

I'm not going to lie, tonight was a pretty hard night. Fear hit me like a brick. I lack in faith so much sometimes. Thinking that I'm going through this alone. I understand that God is with me, and going to be with me in Brazil but I just want him to hug me a bit tighter sometime so I feel him a bit more. The fear, emotions and all the other things that are filling my head feel as if sometimes they overtake my heart. I know this is where God wants me, but in those HARD times, I sometimes just want to take the easy way out.
So, I ask you to pray that the fears inside me will go away, and that Ill fill those moments of fear with praise and worship to God.

I again thank you for all the prayers and support. They sure help SO much!

Much Much love

Look out BRAZIL, here I come!

So, as you probably have guessed, I'm off to Sao Paulo BRAZIL!! I'm so excited and so at peace with the decision.
This morning we started off with worship, then the teams were revealed. It was so nerve racking. I was so scared and nervous. When i saw who my team was and where I was going, I was so HAPPY. God totally gave me a totally peace about it all and I'm so thankful for that.
Now is when we start to get ready for what we will be doing in Brazil. I'm not exactly sure what we will be doing there yet, but I'm very excited to see what God has in store for me.

Please continue to pray that our team unites and get along well.

Thanks for all the prayers and support

Much Love

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Just a few more hours...

Well, tomorrow at this time I will know where I'm going! I'm very excited and SO scared at the same time. Not knowing where you'll be spending the next 7 months of your life, and who you'll be with is crazy!
Please pray that I will have peace on my placement and my team. That as a team well be excited about serving God where he wants us.

I will update you all tomorrow on the decision!

Much love

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Talk Talk Talk!!!!

Hello!!!! (it feels so great to say this)

I can finally talk again! My 48 hours of silence was so HARD! Wow, I don't know where to start. It began at 1:30 on Thursday. I started off with a nice walk around the little pond swamp thing we have here just down the street. I thought that I would start off this 48 hours with a little walk with God.
A side story - A few days ago when I was in my confusion, I went for a walk around the pond swamp thing, and I saw a beaver swimming in it. I thought that it was so cool. I just watched it until it was out of my site. It was so amazing.
So, as I walked around the pond again on Thursday, I pleaded with God, that if he was truly with me, he would show me the beaver again within the next 48 hours. Since going through this tough week, it was so hard to know that God was truly with me. That through this confusion and doubt he was walking right beside me. As soon as I said that all I herd was a voice inside me say
" hahah, oh Corryn I have something so much better."
As I look back at that moment, I can't believe I even questioned the creator of the universe to reveal something like that. I know that on God's time, he will reveal himself to me. And if he choose not to, that will be ok too.
The Lord God of my life is a living one, and I will put my whole trust in him. He will not get me around the tough times, he will get me thought them.

These past few days, I have found myself journaling. I have never really liked it, or done it much. But I have felt like I can be so real with God through what I write down.
I have also found so much joy in reading the bible. I have read through many books these past 48 hours, and I never knew how much I related to them. Its like I'm reading my own stories. I find it so amazing how God can use the Scripture to related to our own lives. All these past years, I have just felt like I'm reading a story. It was truly amazing to just be with God these past days.
With Gods strength, love and faith I'm so excited to say that I will be doing Trek this year. I know that with him leading me though my darkest hours, I will be able to do this. I very well know that it is NOT going to be easy at all. But I just know that this is what he wants me to do. Also I'm at peace with this decision. Thanks for all the prayers for this.

Once again, that you so much for all the prayers, love and support. They have comforted me thought the nights, and gotten me thought the tears.

Psalm 62 : 1-2

"My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken."

I love you all.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

The night before the Silence

Loved Ones:

Well tomorrow is the big day. 48 whole hours with no talking, computers, cellphones etc. Just our bibles, pens and journals. I'm looking forward to it, but also very nervous about it. I don't think I have gone that long in my life without talking..... actually I don't think I have gone 48 seconds without talking! I know God will talk to me and I'm SO ready to listen. I'm looking forward to hearing his voice, and then doing what he says.

Things have gotten better here. I'm having a great time getting to know people better and sharing our stories. I am still going through many tough times, with many tears... then concluded with many hugs. I never knew how much home meant to me until I got here. Last night was the first night where I was truly home sick. Just wanting to go home and sleep in my own bed, and seeing my family. Its hard, but I once herd a little saying " With God, all things are possible."

God has so much in store for me and I can't wait to see what that it. We have had many great speakers come in and talk to us. I have learned that I need to trust God more, and know that he wants whats best for me, even thought It may be hard. I know that I can do anything with God leading me.

Please pray that I will have peace after the silence, and that things will continue to get better. I want to thank you all again for all the prayer and messages. They truly mean SO much to me.I

love you all

Monday, September 15, 2008

My First week at TREK

Hello everyone!

Well my TREK experience has begun. It has been a week and I have learned so much already. When I got to the Mark centre last Sunday, I had so many mixed feelings. The first night was tough. I think I might have got 2 hours of sleep. That night was filled with many tears. I felt that I was not at peace with where I was. Like God had other plans for me elsewhere. This feeling is very hard to understand and to accept. This whole week has been filled with trials, fears and a sense of unsettlement. I still to this moment don't know where God wants me, and the waiting period is the hardest. I ultimately want to do what God wants me to do, and waiting for that moment is what is the hardest. I just want to take a moment to THANK my family, friends and loved ones for the unconditional support. That support is felt here in Abbotsford, and I truly thank you for all the prayers, text messages, e mails, calls and thoughts. I love you all. Today has been the first day where I have felt the most peace.
On Thursday we have a silent retreat for 48 hours where we are to listen to God. Please pray that God will lead me to where he wants me to be, and be there with total peace and with no regrets.
I have met the most amazing people here. They have challanged me to truly love God, to TRUST him with everything, and to sumit to him.
I love you all and will keep you updated with where God is leading me.
Keep me in your prayers, your all in mine!